Beam Me Up, Scotty!

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If the last two episodes (or if we want to be serious, the entire series thus far) of AMC’s The Walking Dead has reminded me of one thing, it’s that while I enjoy being a voyeur of the craziness of a post zombie apocalyptic world, it will never make my personal list (yes, I do have one) of fictional worlds I would love to live in if they actually existed.

The constant stench of rotting flesh? Playing daily whack-a-zombie just to have some space to live? Having to sleep alone and locked away from others for fear of either myself or my loved one dying during the night and turning into a zombie or becoming zombie chow? Pioneer medical care that amounts to swigging from a bottle of liquor before clamping down on a piece of wood and just bearing the pain as it comes? No central A/C or television?! No, thank you.

Sad to admit it, but I would’ve been in the wave of those hopeless people that ‘opted out’ in the early days. Not even the promise of Daryl Dixon as my redneck protector could convince me it was worth it to forage onward. The world of The Walking Dead is firmly on my ‘Kill me if this somehow comes to pass’ list, along with A) anything having to do with a vampire population explosion B) Skynet taking over and having to live under the rule of the Terminator or C) Cylons rising up against us and blowing everything up. If any of these events happen, my branch of the family tree ain’t growing out any longer.

However, I would suck it up to live in the world of the Hunger Games. Sure, it’s a hard, corrupt world that sacrifices its young, but it’s not as zero sum as the Walking Dead. Same with Game of Thrones. Again, a hard, ruthless world, but one that is survivable. If you’ve read the books you’d know the cuisine alone is worth the hassle and there is the possibility of seeing direwolves and dragons. NBC’s Revolution would also be manageable as long as I was nowhere near bossy Charlie. It may not have iPods any longer and is a straight-up dictatorship, but at least I wouldn’t have to deal with zombies.

Making it to my list of fictional worlds that I would jump at the chance to live in?

Star Trek. The Next Generation era. Hands down. How can you listen to Patrick Stewart (or William Shatner) say those opening lines and not be looking for the nearest Starfleet Academy enlistment office? It’s space!  You’re in the most posh, plushy spaceship ever cruising at warp speed from planet to planet! You’d meet aliens and have all sorts of cool gadgets like the iPad’s evolved progeny and hyposprays and tricorders to play with. Bored in the mess hall? Go play on the Holodeck and romance a hologram. Yes, there would be dangers: I’d make sure to not wear the red shirt uniform of death and set my phaser to the max whenever the Borg comes prowling, but it would be worth the risks because Jean Luc ‘Make it so!’ Picard would be my captain and Data would be one of my BFFs.

Harry Potter.  Every year when Harry, Ron, and Hermione talked about the classes they were taking at Hogwarts I was green with envy. Potions? Transfiguration? Charms? Defense Against the Dark Arts? There were magic classes for everything and I so wanted to take them, pass my O.W.L., then N.E.W.T. and make a bid to become an Auror. The specter of He-who-shall-not-be-named looming, Death Eaters, and a final wizarding war would not be enough to deter me from the chance of getting a wand, drinking Butter Beer and playing Quidditch on a real flying broom.

The DC Comics Universe.  I’d live with the constant threat of Doomday, Apokalypse, the Joker or any other DC villain causing mayhem if it meant I’d see Superman on a regular basis. Seriously, walking down the street and looking up as he does a low fly-by just to check things out would be so cool.

What fictional world would you like live in if you could?

Twilight

Marvel’s The Avengers

50 Shades of Grey

ABC’s Once Upon A Time

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