Election Day Etiquette

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It’s Election Day! The polls are buzzing, the pundits are punting and by the end of the day, Wolf Blitzer (et al.) will be calling a very close race.  And what a race it’s been. From marathon-running running mates to super-celebrity endorsements, this election year has all the makings of a 2030 high school history lesson.

And on this special day that comes but once every four years, it’s important you play by the rules. So take a look below at some helpful dos and don’ts that’ll help you get through Election Day with style and grace: A true Election Day Etiquette Guide.

DO:

Be nice to your polling place volunteers. Maybe bring them some orange slices, too.

DON’T:

Throw orange slices at polling place volunteers. The line will move when it wants to, OK?

DO:

Come in an hour late to work. You can’t get in trouble, you just can’t.

DON’T:

Come in 5 hours late to work. Cuz thaz just rude.

DO:

Show your patriotism with red, white and blue clothing!

DON’T:

Show your patriotism with ex-President masks. Halloween’s over, nerds.

DO:

Wear an “I voted” sticker.  It’s cute, it’s sexy and it’ll make your coworkers who didn’t vote feel inferior.

DON’T:

Ask your coworkers who they voted for. It’s rude, unbecoming and everyone will hate you.

DO:

Bake elephant and donkey-shaped cookies. (Yum!)

DON’T:

Bake elephant and donkey-flavored cookies. (Ew.)

DO:

Get up the courage to talk to your crush today.  You’ll have at least one thing to talk about…

DON’T:

Ask who he/she voted for. IT’S STILL NOT COOL, OK?

DO:

Spend your evening watching The American PresidentDave or Mr. Smith Goes To Washington.  Cause you know TNT will be playing that shiz on repeat.

DON’T:

Spend your evening dancing to Jamiroquai.

And finally…

DO:

Vote.

DON’T:

Not Vote.

Like our fearless celebrity leaders have been telling us for months, it’s incredibly important that you get out and vote today. Vote for the good of your country, for the good of your fellow (wo)man and most importantly, for yourself.

Now take a moment to vote in another (somewhat less important) election.  Which big-screen candidate is your favorite?

Warren Beatty (Bulworth)

George Clooney (The Ides of March)

John Travolta (Primary Colors)

Reese Witherspoon (Election)

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