What’s the Best One-Hit Wonder Song?

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So today, even though I’d like to unravel the mysteries behind Taylor Swift’s curious public apology to Taylor Lautner (in her new & hugely popular album she allegedly references their ‘breakup’) there’s not enough time do any justice to that baffling state of affairs. Rather, I’d like to focus on a new TV show…and talk about one-hit wonders. With all the bad news about network programs being canceled,  I’ve noted something interesting or at least eye-catching that you might want to check out. On a cable TV channel called the DIY Network. Until now I’ve never watched the DIY Network, and though I see it has many devoted fans, I can’t imagine  I’d be one, until now. In all honesty this is a channel  for inspired, interesting, creative people who want to build a mahogany birdhouse or clean valuable Italian ceramic tile in a jiffy. And truly, bless those good-natured, patient DIY TV hosts (and they are, I tuned in and watched them) who will show me how to apply caulk. I am only going to disappoint them. Til now. Here’s the headline these DIY people got me with:

The Vanilla Ice Project: Premieres Thursday, October 14 at 9/8c on D I Y

Sheer curiosity is propelling me to catch this Vanilla Ice broadcast. Because Lord knows we have seen any number of stars’ careers go down in flames. And some of them are genuine jerks who do really awful things like hit people or draw weapons, and I believe that those people should fade into a very unpopular oblivion, condemned to a celebrity’s worst nightmare  (i.e., no attention and no cell phone reception). But I know there are other stars in a slightly lesser camp. Stars who did things that were really stupid and/or embarrassing and they’re the kind of people who you remember for being  interesting for about three minutes and then they got into all sorts of trouble and then you forgot about them altogether. I’m pretty sure Vanilla Ice was one of those guys. All I remember about him was that he appeared out of nowhere, then he wasn’t where he said he was from, that he was a big mouth but that his song was really catchy. Until every radio station realized that too. So here’s to one-hit wonders.  I actually had to look up what Vanilla Ice had done anyway, subsequent to the shame of fibbed origins. Why was he the butt of so many jokes? So I checked.  Turns out, the guy really is a blustery type whose posturing and bad behavior got him into a fair amount of real trouble, particularly since much of his most famous song “Ice Ice Baby” was not originally credited to Queen and David Bowie. Which I hadn’t realized. I had thought he was on the up-and-up about where his tune came from (well, maybe not his tune but the part that we all know and what I think made it so incredibly catchy). But apparently not. There are conflicting stories about settlement and none of it looks too good on paper but again, curiosity has reared its ugly head. Evidently this guy’s had a post-Surreal Life awakening and turned over some kind of new leaf and has now decided to remodel and sell homes. Apparently he’s good at it too. So much so, that we’ll perhaps tune in. According to the listing Rob Van Winkle  (his real name) promises the following on his on his new DIY show:

We put an infinity pool in the yard with these fire pods that throw up like 8 feet of fire and change color. We put a theater in what used to be an attic… And then we have mood lighting. If you walk in and you’re in a bad mood, the lights go red. And they’re fiber optics, with shooting stars all over the ceiling”.

Are you intrigued? I’m still not sure. But it certainly piqued my curiosity. And it might just be better than S$%^& My Dad Says. Now, let’s go to our poll. VH-1 had a show devoted exclusively to one-hit wonders, and of course the entire list is subject to a great deal of argument and commentary. That said, let’s take a look at a basic sampling of four of their top ten. Voice  your choice in today’s featured poll and tell us which of these one-hit wonder songs is your favorite (and add any others you wish) :

1)    Los del Río — “Macarena”

2)    Right Said Fred — “I’m Too Sexy”

3)    Vanilla Ice — “Ice Ice Baby”

4)    Baha Men — “Who Let the Dogs Out?”

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